Having a Heart of Worship - A Nighttime Prayer
But we have this treasure in jars of clay, to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to us. We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our bodies. -- 2 Corinthians 4:7-9 (ESV)
We felt like giving up. Why had God called us to this church if some leaders would treat us so badly? My pastor-husband rested on our sofa between services. Pain engulfed us as a lay leader had twisted our words into something that barely resembled what we had said. Meanwhile, my husband’s cancer resisted treatment.
“Why did God call us here?” I asked him. “Certainly, He did. Our call was clear and confirmed by the elders.”
“I don’t know,” he replied, “but I do know that I’m still here, so I’m not done.”
He was right. We weren’t done.
Entering the sanctuary with church board members glaring at us felt like walking before a firing squad. With the strength only God could give, he preached with focused spiritual fervor. Since his cancer had recently been deemed untreatable, we planned to resign at the end of the month. In a tense meeting, however, the board decided to force him out early, even though he’d performed all his pastoral duties well. A large group of supporters affirmed his valuable ministry. We left in early April, and my husband died in August of the same year.
Feeling shattered, I could only think, God isn’t like that. What happened wasn’t from Him. I found solace in a church nearby, and there I began to heal. I’d seen many pastors’ families destroyed by similar power players. I believe I survived then and thrive now because I focused on God’s loving faithfulness. The Lord revived my spirit, helped me gather my broken pieces, and guided me on in life.
God grows resilience in us through trials, as Paul illustrates in our passage. The church in Corinth had been infiltrated by false teachers who slandered Paul’s ministry. Their pressure prompted him to write in defense of his ministry. Paul was no stranger to persecution, which should never have come from inside the church. He tells them that God’s power showed through his weakness so they could see his ministry came from God. It was also by God’s power that he wasn’t crushed, driven to despair, forsaken, or destroyed. God developed Paul's resilience through many trials, and this one revealed God's strength.
Resilience isn’t inborn but spiritually crafted by our Creator. We often think that He wouldn’t give us more than we can handle, but He does allow it. If you are struggling with opposition in ministry, know that God uses trials and tribulations to develop resilience in you, as He did in Paul’s life. May you know His power working through you will be revealed.
