TEST - Family is Messy
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And I will be a Father to you, and you will be sons and daughters to me, says the Lord Almighty. - 2 Corinthians 6:18 (CSB)
An older man came forward one Sunday morning to give his heart to Christ. He was alone and barely able to walk. He later was baptized with great care and gentleness. His face glowed with peace and the love of Jesus in his heart. A few of his family attended his baptism, but the elation I’d expected from them didn’t seem to be there. Maybe they had known a different version of the man than I had the privilege to know. Then I heard he had been difficult at his residence, speaking harshly to the staff.
But the man had changed as Jesus had come into his life and the Holy Spirit took up residence in the elderly man’s heart. I don’t know how he lived his younger years. To me, his former life doesn’t matter. What’s important now is how he lives the remainder of his life.
Family can be messy. Even mental illness can be misunderstood by other family members. It can’t be measured like blood glucose numbers define diabetes and blood pressure numbers diagnose hypertension. It offends and alienates family members that don’t understand or want to deal with a mentally ill individual. Yet we’re still family.
The closer we are to someone the harder it can be to give them the chance to change or to accept that there might be an underlying physiological reason for their behavior. We want to hold on to the memory of their old behaviors and attitudes.
Jesus was a brother and neighbor kid that grew up to be The Prophet, and The Savior of the world. But in Mark 6:4 (CSB), we read that his own household and village didn’t honor His knowledge, wisdom, and miracles.
We are commanded to love one another. 1 John 4:21 and 5:2 tells us that loving our brothers and sisters in Christ is how we show our love for God. Family is messy sometimes, that’s true— even our church family. But we can ask God’s help in loving them through the mess and giving them the chance to change. I pray I will focus on the present and leave their past in the past. I hope they can leave my past in the past as well.
Questions for Reflection:
1. Can you look at troublesome family members with fresh eyes?
2. Can you give your troublesome family in Christ members a new chance to reconcile?
3. People can change. Wouldn’t it be a shame to miss the chance to know the newer version?
4. How can you set healthy boundaries and still share God’s unfailing love with your family and extended family of Christ?
